13 Reasons that the Pixies are the Greatest Rock Band Ever

Derived by myself from too many online sources:

  1. You liked their sound, esp. the guitars like I do.
  2. They are from Boston and you are from Boston.
  3. You are from California and you simply “don’t get” music from outside of the U.S., much less beyond California.
  4. They were the only band that your friends listened to when you were a teenager.
  5. They were the only band that you listened to when you were a teenager.
  6. That they were independent artists.
  7. What David Bowie, a mainstream artist, once said about the Pixies.
  8. What U2’s Bono, a mainstream artist, once said about the Pixies.
  9. What Kurt Cobain said in 1994 about the role of the Pixies in his writing of “Smells Like Teen Spirit” during an interview in Rolling Stone, except for that part when Cobain said that he was also thinking about Boston (the band known for “More Than a Feeling”) and “Louie, Louie.”
  10. That you believe that the Pixies led to Nirvana, that Nirvana was the end all and be all of everything, and given the fallacy of association, that the Pixies are also great.
  11. The only thing you seem to read is Rolling Stone, a publication that hated KISS and Britpop and then had to recant itself, and apparently R.S. said that the Pixies had invented everything from alternative rock to indie rock and to grunge.
  12. You are now just getting onto the bandwagon.
  13. You are a member or former member of the Pixies.